pexels-photo-268435Genesis 1:31

And God saw everything that He had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

Psalms 139:14

I will praise thee; for i am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

I was 15 years old and in high school, Senior 2 to be exact, an equivalent of Form 2 in Kenya. I was young, so proud, noisy (class noisemaker) and struggling with self esteem. No one ever knew i was struggling, not even my closest friend, i knew how to hide it behind my pride, so well i almost deceived myself.

I hated my legs, i hated my feet, i hated my face, i felt like i wasn’t beautiful enough…i wasn’t even being approached by any boys in school…ours being a mixed school…goodness, i asked God why…despite me not having an intimate relationship with God. I had and still am bow legged…i had and still have a slender and long foot…size 7/40…i felt like my toes were not the epitome of beauty…i had big brown eyes, cheek bones and a double chin…felt like i had attributes of a male…every single day was a struggle, i described myself as a walking disaster. I had my own ‘click’ of friends who in my heart and everyone else’s they were the definition of beauty…i hid my insecurities behind their beauty.

I can’t remember when exactly i stopped having low self esteem and trashing myself but i can say for a fact i love me…when i started accepting the flaws that made me beautiful, that made me uniquely me, i became someone totally different. When i read God’s word and saw myself through His eyes…even the devil has got nothing on me.

When i had this revelation, nothing could stop me…my demeanor changed, my mindset changed. I would strut down the streets of my school like i owned it…like it was my runway. Formerly known as the chaotic noisy girl…now i was ‘Her Yellowness’ ( i am yellow) , popular brown and beautiful girl in school…i even got boyfriends. ( :-/ ). I was still noisy and chaotic though…

Think about it…if all of us looked the same and did the same things ( not saying this in bad faith…Chinese all look the same to me, yet they are different )…won’t the world be so boring? Accept you, love you…because when our Father was creating you…He only had you in mind…no one else…one original…not a copy. Every time i read Psalms 139, tears come to my eyes. How wonderful is my Father, who knows me in and out…knows all my flaws and mistakes, past, present and future and still loves me the same…and still loves me unconditionally…and still calls me beautiful…very good.

I am beautiful…in and out… ¬†fearfully and wonderfully made, i am very good…because God’s word says that everything He made is very good…nothing He made is ugly. The power of ‘I AM’ starts with self love and self acceptance…its hard to value something that doesn’t value itself, same goes for us human beings…

Each and everyone of us was created in His image (Genesis 1:26-27) . Sit down and think…is God ugly? No…you are what and who God says you are. You are beautiful, made in His image and likeness, fearfully and wonderfully made, very good.

Believe in His word and see your life change before your very eyes. He loves you, ask Him to show you how He sees you. See yourself through His eyes.

My God said it, I believe it and that settles it.







Matthew 6:33

But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Last year was a year of major transformation for me…my life literally took a 360 degree turn, i did things i had never done before, it was an exciting experience because i moved from one spiritual level to another.

God made my feet move, initially i knew He was ordering my steps, but i wasn’t ready at all for all that He had actually planned for me. I came to Kenya from Uganda for a holiday, to spend time with my family and my best friend and we had also planned a short vacation since we were both so busy working and not playing. I also had plans to go visit my brother and his family in Germany so i had to process my papers from my homeland.

From the moment i arrived, everything changed, i was denied a visa..(which turned to be for my good) and continued with my vacation plans. When time came for me to go back to Uganda, God told me to wait, i sadly watched my best friend leave me behind not knowing what i was waiting for apart from God’s lead. So for two months of doing nothing but sitting in the house watching TV and occasionally going out to meet a few friends (rating 1/10 times), i naturally became impatient.

I could only echo God telling me to wait. Then He told me to rest, in my menial mind, i was like i am doing nothing…of course i am resting…what do You mean rest. One fine day, i was led to watch a sermon on resting in God’s finished works ( Hebrews 4:1-10)…that was when i got the revelation that i needed to stop working and worrying in my mind and actually rest in my spirit because my Father had it all taken care of. I neede to just stop working in my mind and tiring my spirit man.

It was in this quietness that i truly found out what God wanted me to do, what my destiny and purpose was…i knew my purpose, i just didn’t know how to get to doing and walking in the purpose i was created for. I was eventually led to join Bible School and i did all the 3 tiers and finished November last year. (There’s a big story pertaining to this too).

I remember literally being home only to sleep, i barely ate because i would get home so tired, just take a bath and head to bed. My Mama would forcefully wake me up to eat. I remember being in church every single day from early morning to late evening. The force that was driving me wasn’t my own. My heart swelled with so much love for God’s house. I understood what David said in Psalms 69:9 The zeal of God’s house had eaten me up, i was consumed, i was in Evangelism, i did Sanctuary Keeping, i was in Choir (my first love in serving God), i was in Prayer Squad, i literally lived and breathed God and church.

My mum once told me that i was over doing this church thing…she complained that we were not spending much time together…she had a right to, she hadn’t seen her daughter in years and when she finally did, i was so busy in God’s house. When i was home i would be praying or reading the Bible. I would ask her how she was and find out how her day had been then seclude myself in this tiny cocoon of mine to fellowship with my Father. I served God with all of me, time came i ¬†was so exhausted and my body was screaming ‘HELP, I NEED REST’ , but i still kept working for my God because He fueled me, He gave me strength.

I thoroughly sowed my all into God’s kingdom and i can joyfully say that my Father rewarded me and continues to reward me. Doors of employment opportunities opened, i am currently working in a job i never applied for, doing what i love and in line with my purpose…which was once my prayer point. Doors of financial favor opened…i was and still am so blessed i cant believe where i am. I get to buy my Mama things and send her money every month. God is always good. (2 Timothy 2:6 , Hebrews 11:6)

Our God is a good God, He is not a taskmaster…He rewards those who diligently work for and seek Him. No labor for His kingdom is in vain. We are halfway 2017 but i am still reaping the harvest of what i sowed last year. My God has never disappointed me, there is never a time i labored to promote His kingdom and He never surprised me…seeking for the interests of His kingdom always attracts humongous blessing.

I am not bragging about my relationship with God…don’t get me wrong…i am appreciating what He has done in my life and what He continues doing. I can’t brag about my love for God because i fail Him daily, i can brag about His love for me because He never fails me and His love never fails.